Showing posts with label acceptance. Show all posts
Showing posts with label acceptance. Show all posts

Friday, February 22, 2013

Sometimes You Suck

Sometimes yoga is all about aiming for perfect alignment and holding a solid pose for ages. Other times you just want to get out of your head and into the flow. Sometimes you need to expand your horizons and try a new pose.

When you're in the flow - channel the breath and let go of expectations of perfection. If your practice has been slipping - your poses may not be as easy or pretty as they once were. When you're trying something new you have to get comfortable with the idea that you'll probably suck at it. You might fall on your face, your ass, and your ego. Even poses you've done a thousand times can surprise you on a bad day. Some days you will suck. And that's okay.


For teachers - sometimes your students will not be any good. Maybe they're doing their best but they're new; maybe your class is too fast-paced to get all the kinks worked out in each pose. These things can be fine. There's a place for the single beat pose class and the beginner's flail. Take care of your students, help them out, keep them safe but as one of my teacher trainers told us - Sometimes you just have to let them suck.

Thursday, August 23, 2012

My New Mantra

"There are things you can control & there are things you can't. 
When you know the difference you have arrived." - The Daily Love (via twitter)

via  http://yogachick.tumblr.com/post/29637511382/uttanasana-standing-forward-bend

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Tuesday, June 5, 2012

Resistance to Practice: Lighten Up!

Doldrums, disinterest, lack of motivation... Whatever you want to call it - it can be a veritable brick wall. The first time this happens to you isn't really much different than the 50th time. It's always uncomfortable. Everyone deals with it differently. When the last thing you want to do is practice - how do you handle it?

I suggest that you lighten up!

My asana practice has been dragging ass for a few months. The very sight of my mat kinda makes me groan at the notion of practice.

Finally I realized that if I relax my requirements of what counts as practice then I might do more yoga. I started doing yoga in my pajamas in the grass of my backyard, at the gym in the middle of the "stretching area" in my sneakers, or in the carpeted living room while wearing socks. Turns out I just need a new perspective for a while.


My practice is different (again) and I've sort of distilled it down to the pieces I enjoy the most. I've removed the "fluff" and I'm doing lots of lunges, hanumanasana, and pigeon mostly. I've made huge strides in my poses by doing this. That doesn't mean I never do the other stuff. I just mostly focus on my big loves and loosening my expectations is treating me well.

When you want nothing to do with yoga - focus on what you love.

By immersing my practice in joy and letting go of the picky details like always having to be barefoot I'm reconnecting to why I love the practice and this slump will pass.

    Wednesday, February 22, 2012

    Adventures in Picture-Taking

    If you keep up with my Flickr page at all - then you might know I posted a handful of new photos this weekend. I try to do that about once a month. Sometimes you don't realize how much your poses have grown until you compare pictures that are a couple years apart. Anyway, today I wanted to show a few of the pics that didn't make the cut for one reason or another. Bloopers, out-takes, whatever you want to call them - here they are.





    And one ridiculous bonus pic where I look scared of the hoop.

    Tuesday, February 14, 2012

    I Heart You

    I wanted to write something awesome and love-filled for Valentines Day. I don't really care for the holiday myself, but that doesn't mean I need to be a party pooper. However - my dog has been sick for a couple days - throwing up all over the place. Everyone knows that vomit knows nothing of schedules so I haven't really slept and I'm frankly just too damn tired to write anything amazing or original today. Sorry.

    Source: http://ohjoy.blogs.com/my_weblog/2012/01/big-love.html

    I will instead offer up to you these fun things from around the internet. Happy Valentine's Day ♥



    Thursday, November 3, 2011

    Just Stop

    This is totally how I feel as a yoga teacher with my students. Seriously. When I say at the beginning of class that you can stop and rest or opt out of any part of class - I mean it.

    Monday, October 3, 2011

    Friday - Looking Back

    Friday was a lot of things...including but not limited to: the end of the month, my 11 year anniversary (since our first date), and the first time I got one of my feet behind my head.

    Now as October begins - it's becoming harder to deny that my favorite season Summer is gone. The weather is still mostly here, but the cooler mornings and nights are creeping in for sure. I'm trying my best to accept Autumn, but the idea of wearing pants and starting to wear sweaters soon is not thrilling. Hopefully the increased opportunities to bake and celebrate birthdays, anniversaries, and holidays will help.


    My anniversary was nice - nothing too horribly exciting, but good. Our wedding anniversary is coming up soon so we don't tend to make a huge deal out of the dating anniversary. Basically we went out to a nice restaurant and had what turned out to be mediocre food. Despite my best efforts I really don't like polenta or red cabbage. The live music was fun though. I definitely enjoyed that.

    Oh yeah, and I got my foot behind my head... which is barely even noteworthy. That's how I've been feeling anyway. If you've been around a while you may recall that after my foot reached my head in King Pigeon pose - that Eka Pada Sirsana was my next big goal. Every day I feel equally distant from that goal as the day I set it, but Friday it just kinda happened. Now I always thought that achieving this feat would be like - "Fuck Yeah!", but it turned out to be a half smile, and then I pretty much forgot about it. I've been terribly underwhelmed about the whole thing. Does that mean I'm becoming less attached to the fruits of my labor? Maybe. If so, I'm okay with that. I only managed it with one foot... so one of these days I'll be an ambidextrous foot-behind-header and that'll be neat. For pictures at least. Something I don't have any of yet.

    Kino Macgregor - Ashtanga Badass and Teacher

    So what is all this rambling about? Well - as the seasons change and the earth gets a bit quieter it's a good idea to turn inside and do some assessing. See where you've been, check out where you are, and realize where you're going. Shed your attachment to the past, try to make the most of your present, and if your future does not look promising - either learn to accept it or take action to change it Now.

    Photo Source: The top pic is mine, but the bottom pic is from KinoYoga.

    Wednesday, August 31, 2011

    Less Throwing, More Breathing

    I think my mail-woman needs to take up yoga. Everyday I know the mail has arrived when I hear her zoom past. It's kind of like on Funny Farm, but in the suburbs. Even my packages she seems to throw at the house. I can just hope that one day she becomes less anxious, slows her breath, becomes less reactive, and slows down a little bit altogether. Slow down mail-lady. Slow Down.

    In the meantime, I'll just have to accept that my packages arrive like they've been drop kicked at the door to save time.


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    Monday, July 25, 2011

    Beginner's Mind - Like a Fish

    I spend a lot of time on this blog talking (and even teaching a little bit) about things I'm good at. I don't talk much about my weaknesses. One of my biggest weaknesses that I'm reminded of every summer is swimming. It's not like I can't swim, but I'm not even remotely a strong swimmer.


    I can do challenging yoga for like 9 hours a day, and I can run for at least 5 miles without much work, but swimming in freshwater around 80 feet is HARD. I was at the lake yesterday and practicing maintaining my composure in water maybe 10 feet deep. I was swimming the length of the dock (80 feet or so) and then swimming back. I do this for cardio and for general practice. Ya never know when you're gonna need to swim. Every year I have to re-learn all these skills and work back up to being comfortable in deep water... then work on basic swimming skills... then on stamina and ability to hold my breath. It's crazy. It's humbling. I can outrun Adam by distance a thousand times, but he swims like a fish and I swim like a clumsy rock.

    In Yoga we're supposed to at least attempt to always come at our practice from a space of being open and listening. Not cocky, not like we already know what we're doing. We're still supposed to take the time to quiet the mind, open to grace, feel what's going on and what can shine brighter. When you're just as open as a fresh newbie at her first class with no expectations and the willingness to try - This is beginner's mind.

    What brings you back to beginner's mind? For me it's swimming. Definitely.

    Wednesday, July 13, 2011

    Your Future Self is Better Than You

    People are naturally competitive... even when no one is around we tend to compete with ourselves. Yesterday's quote was all about this. It can be a major motivator, or it can be an anvil holding you down.

    Generally yoga is considered non-competitive. Generally. There are asana competitions and there's many peoples tendency to eyeball the best person in yoga class wanting to have the ability to hold a textbook Utkatasana for minutes without a sweat. Humans compete - it's built into our genetics and instincts. If we weren't competitive the human race would've died out instead of the neanderthals. Competition is handy when it decides who lives and who dies. Its even helpful when you're trying to achieve a goal and you need something to help you do better today than 2 months ago. Competition drives progress.


    However, sometimes that competitive outlook can weigh you down if you're not on top. If you're doing worse today than yesterday, or six weeks ago, or four years ago - your natural drive to want to be better than you think you were then is going to irritate and discourage you. It happens, but don't let it get you down. Just because you sat in painless meditation for 45 minutes yesterday doesn't mean you have to do it again today. Five minutes is just fine.

    Let yourself be where you are today. Sometimes you need to compete with yourself on your ability to accept things as they currently are.

    Wednesday, June 29, 2011

    Moving. For Real.

    Guys I wrote this week's posts last week - and as I'm writing this post all my stuff is being taken away. I'm literally sitting on a bare wooden floor in a mostly empty house. It's just me and the computer. Everything else is packed up and loaded in moving trucks. Yes, we got a house and we're moving in today (6/25)! However, we don't have internet set up yet at the new house, and I can't necessarily predict when it will be started. SOOO... I don't know when my next post will be. Hopefully within a week or 2. Wish me luck being internet-less.... and don't forget about me. oh and do Yoga!


    photo source: fuckyeahyoga

    Monday, May 23, 2011

    Resting 100 Percent

    I woke up yesterday morning with an evil back pain of doom. What's up with that? I don't really know. I didn't even do anything on Saturday, so I've been kinda confused about it. I don't appear to have actively hurt myself, but the pain is definitely there for some reason. I spent most of Sunday just kinda feeling crappy, but otherwise going about my business. I did my morning weekend practice which is just a few sun salutations and meditation. Nothing strenuous. Then later I did some plyometrics (because I do that on weekends) with a 1 mile warm up walk and a 1 mile cool down walk. At that point I actually felt great. All the jumping and pushups and whatnot made me feel amazing. My back didn't even hurt! I can't imagine how plyos could've possibly made my back feel better, so I'm gonna call it a fluke. So I continued going about my day. Went to the park, watched squirrels, cuddled the dog. You know, the usual.


    Hours later I sat down and had this outrageous pain start shooting through my back/shoulder. It comes and goes, but mostly it's there... and it sucks. Some research suggests that depending on what the hell is wrong I should either rest completely for up to 3 days, or I should go on as usual. I usually go by the rule that if it hurts when you're not doing anything - you should rest it completely for a while. Since this pain is definitely there all the time I've decided to give it total complete rest for 2 days and then pick back up with my yoga.


    In the meantime, I'm realizing that I'm somewhere between dedicated and addicted to my yoga. I want to do yoga All The Time. Discomfort? Do yoga! Tired? Do yoga! Feel stiff? Do yoga! Now that I'm not allowing myself to do yoga - it's like I'm going stir crazy. I find myself plotting and trying to figure out ways I can sneak in some yoga anyway. I'm not giving in. I promise. I'm going to rest...but this is really hard.

    John Friend says to give 100% all the time. When you're working - give 100% and when you're resting - rest 100%, so that's what I'm doing. I am committed to doing what's right for my body - even if the right thing is Nothing.

    Doggy Photo Source: Apparently everywhere. That dog gets around.

    Thursday, April 21, 2011

    Touch Your Toes - Eventually

    As a yoga teacher I've gotten a lot of good juicy body-oriented questions. They come from students, from friends, even from random people that have seen my classes from another room. I figure that means I look like I know what I'm talking about. Yay me.

    One question that comes up often, in many variations, is:

    "How long will it be until I can touch my toes?"


    Let me set some things straight about toe-touching. One guy I spoke to said he thought it was "pathetic" that he couldn't touch his toes. Most people that don't specifically work on it - can't touch their toes. You're not pathetic! Ask all your friends and family if they can stand with straight legs and bend over at the hips and touch their toes - you'll likely find that few can. Especially in our current society where people sit in chairs, sit in cars, sit at desks and generally do everything they can to tighten all the muscles that affect toe-touching.

    I've heard a story about a student asking his Guru this popular question.  What did his Guru tell him?
    Stack up a bunch of telephone books or bibles or something. Books with VERY thin pages. Stack them to a height you can bend over and reach today. Keep practicing your forward bends every day. Each day tear off the top page of the stack. How many pages away are you? That's how long will it take.

    Luckily, I like to remind my students that it will probably not take anywhere near that long. If you're new to yoga and you listen to the tips and you do the work on a regular basis then you will see results. You will see results quickly.
    • Tip 1: If you don't want to stack books - you can place a couple blocks down to lift the floor to a more appropriate level.

    • Tip 2: Feet together is limiting, so if you're struggling with your forward bends (or even if you're not) then keeping your feet hip distance apart can be mucho mucho helpful.

    Now you might ask: If it doesn't actually take that long - then what's with the story?
    The point of the story is all about patience. One page a day - that's the kind of patience forward bends require. It's the kind of patience they teach. You may be able to remove a whole book from your stack today, but don't think less of yourself if that one page is all that happens right now. You'll get there in time, and all you can do is breathe and learn to enjoy the practice.

    If you're reading this post there's a good chance you want to read these too:
    Standing Forward Bends for Unflexible Bodies
    Seated Forward Bends for People That Don't Bend That Way
    So Your Forward Bends Suck

    Friday, March 11, 2011

    This is Piss, Isn't it?

    Everytime I think I don't like something - the Universe brings in a massive change that makes me think that perhaps I was wrong. Perhaps it wasn't so bad... what if everything really changes? What if nothing is ever the same? Not just the bad, but the good too. What if the bad stuff gets worse and the good stuff just goes away? "What if" is a really ugly game to play. Don't let yourself wander down that road... and if you find that you're already on it... feel free to just head off into the weeds. Certainly there will be something better in there. Like a lion.


    My husband was laid off from his job this week. It's been a couple days and we're trying to "deal" and really wrap our heads around it. If anyone knows of a great job opportunity for a mid-level Software Engineer... don't keep that tasty nugget to yourself. In response to all this - I'm actually looking for a job. A regular day job kind of thing. I haven't had one of those in like 6 years. I don't know if you know this about me, but outside of yoga I'm not actually qualified to do anything. Eeep! Yoga is a splendid tool - not only for joy but for pain, worry, frustration, and downright terror. I learned that ages ago, and now I just need to remain calm long enough to dip into my little yoga toolbox and use what's in there.

    Friday, December 17, 2010

    Gardening of the Heart

    "If you think you're enlightened, go visit your family."
    - Ram Dass

    There's a lovely article in the November issue of Yoga Journal based off of this quote. It doesn't appear to be currently available on the website, or I'd give you a link to it. Go buy the November issue - read "Branching Out" by Sally Kempton. By now the December issue of YJ might be the one on Newsstands... but if the November issue is still available - you'll notice it. It's Orange with the lovely KK Ledford on the cover wearing fuchsia clothes and long blonde hair. Actually, I don't care if you buy the magazine - stand in the aisle and read it if you must - just read it.

    "On this powerful New Moon plant your prayerful seeds of reconciling with anyone with whom you are in conflict."
    - John Friend via Twitter as @anusarafriend

    These two quotes go together really well I think. If you have some tension building about visiting family for the holiday - just remember it's never too late to plant your prayerful seeds of reconciling.

    Thursday, December 9, 2010

    A Dave of My Very Own

    I was specifically listening to non-Christmas music a couple days ago and these lyrics jumped out at me while listening to my favorite Dave of all time. Dave Matthews Band - love em. Always have - Always will.

    "...What I want is what I've not got
    But what I need is all around me..." - via the song Jimi Thing.

    I thought - how painfully accurate. Isn't this generally the case for most of us? Wanting whatever it is we don't have... while everything we need is right there. I could turn this into a whole yogi-thought post, but I think I'll just leave it there. Something to think on...


    On another Dave note - I've always wanted to meet Dave. Instead, my brother met Dave. Turns out his now-ex-wife went to school with him at some point or something. They're apparently on hugging terms. boo... I want to hug Dave Matthews.

    See there I go... wanting what I don't have...

    photo obviously not mine: whose is it? *shrug*